Thursday, August 5, 2010

In regards to shopping difficulties

I’m not going to respond to whether or not wearing bad clothing is a sin. I think that the previous post was making a point and exaggeration was used to an effect. At least it got a response.

I do want to respond in regards to the difficulty in shopping for flattering clothing.
Let me speak bluntly here. I am what is considered a “plus size”. This means that when I go clothes shopping at the mall out of the around 40 stores selling women’s clothing I can go shopping at about 7. These aren’t stores I even necessarily want to go shopping at, simply stores that make clothing that fits me.

Now it’s easy to get intimidated/irritated/emotionally damaged when faced with this. And I have been to all of those places in my head. However I like looking good more than I like being depressed and sad. The last sentence seems like an obvious one, but seriously sometimes it’s so easy to get in a rut about shopping and mope about clothes rather than facing any real or imagined fears one has about them.

Some of the things I had to get over before I could have any fun with shopping

1    had to except the size I am. None of this I will be a different size in the near future business.

2.     I had to educate myself about what looks good on me. This means trying things on, and being willing to at first commit a significant amount of time to shopping. Also, asking for help from the salespeople and perhaps taking someone with a good clothes eye with you when you shop.

3.     I had to not sabotage myself. Do not go into stores that you know will not work for you just so you can become unhappy. Do not go shopping with cranky kids or low bloodsugar, this will end badly. Do not go shopping determined to find something for an unreasonable price, you will only once again make yourself feel worthless. And do not take someone with you who you know is not helpful or extremely critical in a bad way, the only thing worse than not being able to find clothing that works is getting into a shouting match with someone in the dressing room.

I am aware that I do possess some advantages when it comes to clothes shopping. I have no children to worry about when I am shopping. I am still in my twenties and can therefore more fully embrace trends, which I do. But I believe that people make time for what is important to them.

Also, please do not fall into the trap of thinking that your particular body type is impossible to dress. I suggest a What Not To Wear watching marathon for a first hand look at how almost every woman thinks her body type is hard to dress. Or simply ask your friends who you think have “normal” bodies how easy clothes shopping is for them. My experience is that almost everyone has some part of their body they dislike when it comes to clothes shopping.

I know I mentioned time before but I think it’s critical. You have to be willing to spend the time to know what looks good on you. At this point I have pretty well catalogued what works at what stores on my body. How when I buy Dickies I have to get them a size smaller than other jeans. Torrid for trendy items. Target for cute cheap summer dresses is hard to beat. I also shop the sales. I sign up for the flyers and emails from the stores I like so I know when they are happening. But I do not buy items simply because they are cheap, that is the path to despair.

In conclusion. You have to change your mental attitude about yourself  to be positive in order to enjoy shopping. You have to be willing to put in some effort and not give up when things aren’t going the way you think they should. Because the taste of victory when you reveal that why yes, these are Seven Jeans that I got for $30.00, and yes they do fit my legs perfectly, is oh so sweet. The only thing that makes that feeling better? Glitter.



  1. Thanks for the encouragement Abbs! It does help to know what lines/seaming/cut looks best on you, and it's a great tip to avoid the stores that you know are not good for you... That said, there have been times where no store worked, unless I was buying a tshirt. Thankfully, there are some really spiffy made of knit things around now, and layering makes a lot possible that would otherwise be totally out.

    I would love to see some advice on where to look for current styles....

  2. Nice are absolutely rite that you have to make yourself positve minded in order to enjoy shopping...

  3. I think it would be a huge kick to go shopping with you and have you tell me what works. As it is, I give it the least amount of thought as possible-What will be the least obnoxious, match, and not do weird things when I bend over or some such thing.